Difficult and/or uncomfortable?

Thursday, February 2, 2023 - 10:21

In this article, we invite you to explore the close link between difficulty and discomfort. Indeed, according to us using them with knowledge and awareness, can :

  • allow positive rather than negative inference,
  • access the language of the body,
  • and open doors for individual and/or collective development.

So get ready for a journey between semantics and feelings.

What does the dictionary say?

Let's start with some definitions. The strict definition of these 2 words is the following.

  • "Difficult": Not easy to achieve, requiring great effort; arduous or difficult.
  • "Uncomfortable": Which gives a feeling of discomfort; embarrassing.

What does Wikipedia say about comfort?

“Comfort (or being comfortable) is a sense of physical or psychological ease, often characterized as a lack of hardship. Persons who are lacking in comfort are uncomfortable, or experiencing discomfort. A degree of psychological comfort can be achieved by recreating experiences that are associated with pleasant memories, such as engaging in familiar activities, maintaining the presence of familiar objects, and consumption of comfort foods.

Comfort is a particular concern in health care, as providing comfort to the sick and injured is one goal of healthcare, and can facilitate recovery. Persons who are surrounded with things that provide psychological comfort may be described as being "in their comfort zone". Because of the personal nature of positive associations, psychological comfort is highly subjective.”

A demotivating difficulty?

As we all know, change is complicated. Anchoring certain behaviors, postures, learning or experiences as difficult can make them more insurmountable, arduous, time-consuming or energy-consuming and therefore less attractive.

Thus, describing something as difficult can create heaviness, discouragement, and closure. Even if for some people difficulty is a driving force or a positive challenge, in the long run, this may reduce the desire to develop the skills, to try them again or to practice them.

Looking at the difficulty through the keyhole of comfort

Let's now change our vocabulary and replace "difficult" with "uncomfortable" and see what comes up. "In a training session, participants are invited to do an inclusion exercise. This consists of forming pairs and, in silence, connecting to one's own energy and reaching out to that of the other.

In meta, Anne, a participant, testifies: "It was difficult for me". The trainer asks her if it was difficult or uncomfortable. Anne formulated a few short sentences and became aware of the shift in energy as she moved from one word to the next: "By the way, the exercise was easy and it made me uncomfortable. It's interesting. It opens up area’s for reflection and development for me." We can clearly see that opening the door to comfort actually unveils other horizons. That of well-being, first, and that of "feeling good" and therefore of the body, second.

The question of "easy or difficult" is not erased here. But adding the notion of comfort allows us to identify the combinations of "easy and uncomfortable" and open interesting places for personal development.

Trigger new questions

Through these new horizons, other questions are now possible: "Where did I feel this discomfort?", "What do I need to feel good?", "What do I already know about this discomfort?", "How can I take care of myself in this place?" but also, "Can I sustain this discomfort?" or "How is it evolving?"

This opens up new playground.

A foot in the zone

Hold on. It’s not over! The combination "difficult/uncomfortable" also leads us to the concepts of "comfort zone" and "discomfort zone".

"Getting out of your comfort zone is being an actor in your life, staying in it is being a spectator." Nanan-akassimandou

The concept of "zone" introduces a new less semantic dimension. In reality, this dimension is called "systemic" or group dimension because it is part of an environment and a context.

"Much of what you want in life is outside your comfort zone." Idowu Koyenikan

The zone helps define a clear perimeter of discomfort, limiting the impacts of the difficulty to that same perimeter. It allows the discomfort to be understood within a restricted framework and thus to see both the beginning and the end of it. Even better, the difficulty can now be perceived as a boundary to be crossed, as a personal or group challenge.

What was at first a demotivator is now an ambition, a driving force.

"Stepping out of your comfort zone is supposed to be uncomfortable because we are in new and unknown territory. Being uncomfortable is a sign of success, NOT failure! So if we are uncomfortably out of our comfort zones, then that means we are growing. And THAT is cause for celebration!". Roz Savage

It's your turn !

We see it now. Opening the door to the easy, qualified as (temporarily) uncomfortable, opens up fields of possibilities, evolution and movement. So there's only one thing left for you to do. Test this approach. Ask yourself the question of your challenges and try to modify the perception that you and your teams have of them.

Do not hesitate to come back to us and tell us about the difficulties you have in changing that difficulty.

Sharing is progressing... so don't hesitate.

Article by Isabelle Dubois & Delphine Brasseur

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